I recently placed a post on my danish blog, where I describe a dispute I am having on behalf of Andreas, with the union that organizes the soft drink factory, he works at.
Just a while ago I was re-reading that post.
I don't regret a line I wrote, and I believe my dealings with the union is righteous.
But at the same time I remember the anger, I felt while dealing with them, bubbling and boiling in me. That stomach feeling. How I spoke and thought faster, got high on my anger.
That same anger has bubbled in me frequently in the past month. Mostly in situations, where I should have just surveyed the situation and made sure that wrong things were righted. Which is typically how I handled those situations. But I handled them with that same glowing hot anger bubbling in my midsection - anger directed at somebody who has made a mistake, not to hurt or bother anyone - maybe out of lazyness or ignorance, but certainly not as a personal vendetta against me.
The anger I have felt in those situations have certainly not been righteous. It should have amounted to irritation at the most. But I have been taking things in, letting them get personal.
It is not much like me, and is probably a good measure for how thin my skin is at the moment. Where does all that anger come from?
I need to get in touch with my ability to breathe deep into my stomach and take it easy.
Anger does not become me well.